FUCK YOU.

Dear Landlord,

After I listened to your message I feel compelled to compose this letter. I have been in your complex for nearly two years and after considerable disruptions by most of the past tenants and a worsening neighborhood I have remained courteous and considerate. I never complained about the plumbing issues that I have fixed personally, the continuous monies lost in the washing/drying services or the considerable swings with building temperatures. After being gone for business for fourteen days, I would have easily written a check for January rent, but because you do not accept that form of payment, I was unable to. I run two businesses and am finishing my Master’s degree, I simply DO NOT HAVE THE TIME TO GO TO THE BANK FOR CASH. I find it astonishing that I still have to leave aging currency after my stellar residency and relationship. I politely refuse to continue to burden myself with cash payments of rent and will reluctantly provide you with HALF of the late fee. If this is unacceptable I would appreciate a courteous phone conversation as to why.

I appreciate your experience in your position and acknowledge the difficulty of your occupation. I would hope by this point you would understand I have no ill regard for you or the facility. Please respect my attempted professional and polite communication.

Kindest Regards,

Me.

no specifics here, but

I ABSOLUTELY HATE LOCAL FREEBIE COMMERCIALS.

E.G. There's the Local East vs West Football game and they sell the adv to local clients right? AWESOME. exc its the worst FUKIN DISPLAY OF LOCALIZED CREATIVE CHEAP TALENT IN THE WORLD. I know that Its hard doing a commercial and making Mom's Tap House and Quick Lube exciting, but I think a KINDERGARDEN TEACHER MAY HAVE DONE A BETTER JOB WITH THE FUKIN BAD ASS FINGER PAINTING TALENT THEY HAVE THESE DAYS.

CHEESE AND RICE.

/RANT

Cadillcrap

WOW! That's attention grabbing!

Edible Arrangements

We are arguing about how to write this blog because your commercial AND your concept are FUCKED. By the way, I (abe) totally won the argument.

So, question number 1: Who wants a huge fucking bouquet of pineapple, strawberries, and cantaloupe for 300 fucking dollars?? How is that affectionate? Plus, its in a stupid red basket with pink and white hearts. And the commercial has the girl sprinting to the coffee table after she sees the "bouquet" on the table. And then she gets there, realizes its FRUIT, and gives the guy a fake thank you hug. PSYCH!!

question number deux: WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU PUT THE LEFTOVERS?? So a guy gives me this "beautiful" bouquet of "flowers", I eat them all, and then I have the shits for the rest of our first date?? No. Lets take everything out of the fridge and waste everything in there so we can save this beautiful gift.

Fuck. I have used the rest of my energy for the day on this post. Ugh.

Abe

Found my blog

So I made the first post relatively intoxicated and forgot that I had the blog, which is a tremendous idea.

In closing, prepare yourself. Im gonna bring the marketing pain bitches.

peace.

Meth commercials followed by Casey's

So we are sitting here watching the World Series drinking a glass of wine, which we got for like 9 dollars off...and here comes the PSA for Meth awareness..... So we visit this persons museum of things they lost to meth. Quite moving..... BUT... after the emotional roller-coaster provided by that add comes FUKING CASEYS. CASEY'S ITS ALL GOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDA...... I think there needs to be some tact amongst network providers/media companies on ad placement. Following a "dont do meth" ad with Casey's general store "its all good" is extremely socially awkward....

thanks...bye.